School & Homework

IEP meeting coming up — what do I actually ask for?

Posted by clara_parent · 1 week ago · 25 replies · 433 views
My son's first formal IEP meeting is next week. He was diagnosed with ADHD six months ago and this is the school's first time doing this with us.

I've been reading about what's possible to request but I don't want to walk in asking for everything and getting resistance. What are the most impactful, realistic things to ask for? And what should I avoid saying in the meeting?

5 replies

18
yuki_focus 1 week ago
Ask for extended time on tests — not as a favor, as a documented accommodation. This follows them through school and often into college. Get it on paper.
10
jamie_adhd 1 week ago
Ask specifically about check-ins — whether the teacher can do a quick daily check-in with him about upcoming work. Five minutes of individual attention can prevent a week of avoidance.
5
dev_adhd 1 week ago
The most impactful accommodations in our experience: preferential seating (near the teacher, away from the window), permission to fidget (fidget toy or standing), and written copies of verbal instructions. Those three made more difference than anything else.
2
leila_rsd 1 week ago
Take notes during the meeting and send a follow-up email summarizing what was agreed. Not accusatory — just 'thanks for today, here's my understanding of what we agreed.' This creates a paper trail in the kindest possible way.
4
marcus_burnout 1 week ago
Avoid framing things as things your child 'can't do.' Frame them as things that help your child do their best. 'He does better with written instructions' lands differently than 'he can't remember verbal instructions.'

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